The happiest day of my life was March 25, 2008. That was the day that my life long dream came true and I became a mom. Who could have known that that joy would turn into the worst pain we have ever known?
On July 16th, 2009, I put Sam down for his routine morning nap in a pack-n-play at a cabin that my friend and I had rented. Our plan was to give him the opportunity to nap and then we would head back home that afternoon. Sam chattered through much of the nap. He was finally quiet about 15 minutes before we had to get him up.
We went in to get him and found him on his knees with the cording from the back of the roman shade on the window around his neck. (We had put the pull cord up out of his reach.) I immediately began CPR while my friend called 911. He was able to be resuscitated in the emergency room. While I say that, the only reason he was still alive was due to medical intervention. I truly believe that the reason he was able to be resuscitated was so that my husband would be able to make it there to say goodbye to him. My husband arrived at the hospital that afternoon with our families. We prayed all night for his health but during the night, Sam's organs began failing. The next morning we were told that he was most likely brain dead. We had decided that we wouldn't give up hope and were waiting for testing that afternoon to confirm the diagnosis. Shortly after that, Sam's body grew too tired and he didn't want to fight anymore. The medical team tried again to get him back. We told them to stop and watched as our only child slipped away from us.
The worst day of my life was July 17th, 2009.